


Lost and Put Back Together

by 0bviousLeigh



Series: Children of War [8]
Category: Yu-Gi-Oh! ARC-V
Genre: Family Feels, Gen, SO MANY FAMILY FEELS IN THIS ONE
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-04
Updated: 2016-09-04
Packaged: 2018-08-13 01:39:59
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,578
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7957261
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/0bviousLeigh/pseuds/0bviousLeigh
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Yuri wonders what family is, and if he can ever have one.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Lost and Put Back Together

**Author's Note:**

> Disney had a hidden meaning in Lilo and Stitch. "Lilo" can mean lost in Hawaiian, and to stitch something is to put it together. So "Lilo and Stitch" means "Lost and put back together."

Yuri focuses on the fabric, on the pull of the thread beneath his fingers, the delicate needle pinched between his thumb and index finger. He gets lost in these repetitive movements, the precision needed to create something so frivolous and pretty. This is the last bit of fabric from Serena’s old uniforms, he’s turning it into something for that dreadful snake of hers. But Yuri is a perfectionist, so even if he doesn’t like snakes, he’ll make it something beautiful.

“Whatcha got there?”

Yuri stabs his thumb with the needle and he quickly yanks his hand back so he doesn’t bleed on the white fabric. “Dang it, Yuya,” Yuri mutters, sucking on the puncture.

“Oh, I’m sorry!” Yuya cries, “I thought you knew I was here.”

“I did not,” Yuri says. He’s at the kitchen table, surrounded by thread and patterns and printed pictures of flowers. The house is by no means quiet, but Yuri has gotten very good at tuning out the world around him, which explains why he didn’t hear Yuya coming.

Yuya grabs Yuri’s wrist and pulls his hand closer. “It doesn’t look that deep, but maybe you should put something on it,” Yuya frets, “Can I get you a bandage?”

“No, it’s fine,” Yuri says, hoping he’s not actually blushing, “You just startled me, that’s all.” It’s such a tiny wound, Yuya really doesn’t need to worry so much, and the attention is honestly sending Yuri’s poor heart into a flutter. He clears his throat. “And to answer your question, I’m making an embroidered cape for Serena’s snake. Why she asked for a cape, I have no idea.”

“It looks beautiful,” Yuya says. “What kind of flower is that?”

The cape itself wasn’t hard to make, he used the sleeve of a white shirt for that, but the design that Yuri is stitching on to the fabric is very intricate. “It’s a peony,” he says. “It stands for honor and beauty.” As well as romance and shame, all things that have been on Serena’s mind lately, as well as Yuri’s.

“That’s beautiful,” Yuya says.

Yuri glances over that the pattern instructions, having lost his concentration. He’s flustered now that Yuya is watching him.

“Well, we’re thinking of watching a movie,” Yuya says. “Do you want to join us?”

The living room is right next to the kitchen, so Yuri could watch the movie from the table, but since his concentration has been broken, and Yuya asked, he figures he might as well join everyone in the living room. He puts his sewing supplies away and follows Yuya inside.

“What are we watching?” Sora asks as Yoko sets up the DVD player.

“Lilo and Stitch,” Yoko says. “It’s about friendship and unconventional families.”

“Is it Disney?” Yuri asks. He doesn’t know much about movie companies, but Yuya goes on and on about Disney films, and this sounds like one of them.

“It sure is!” Yuya says. He grabs a bowl of popcorn from the coffee table and hugs it to his chest. He sits on the couch and gestures for Yuri to join him. Yuri tells himself that he’s with Yuya only so he can get a fair share of popcorn, it’s one of the few treats he’s found that he enjoys.

At first, Yuri is confused by the movie. Yuya refuses to explain it to him, and says that Yuri will just have to keep watching. As he watches, Yuri finds himself thinking less about the sheer impossibility of the plot and, dare he say, identifying with this cartoon.

“What?!” Yugo screeches when the social worker says he’s taking Lilo away, “But why?! I don’t understand!”

“She nearly died,” Sora says quietly.

“Just watch,” Yuya says, “It’s Disney, it has a happy ending.”

As the movie progresses, Yuri finds himself fighting tears. En trots over and makes himself at home on Yuri’s lap. Yuri clutches the dog to his chest as Stitch backs away from his creator.

_“I’m waiting.”_

_“For what?”_

_“Family.”_

_“You don’t have one. I made you.”_

_“Maybe I could—”_

_“You were built to destroy. You can never fit in.”_

Yuri whimpers, the sound leaving him against his own will. Yuya puts his arm over Yuri’s shoulders and whispers, “Jumba’s wrong about Stitch. You’ll see.”

Yuri wipes his eyes and stubbornly refuses to cry for the next few scenes.

_“This is my family. I found it all on my own. It’s little, and broken…but still good.”_

Yugo starts sobbing, and Yuto and Sora have tears in their eyes as well. The tears are quickly forgotten about as the movie ends, a happy ending just like Yuya promised it would be. Everyone helps wash the popcorn bowls and tidy up the living room, Yugo and Sora play rock-paper-scissors over who gets to shower first and Yugo cheats by dashing off to the bathroom when Sora’s distracted. Yuri quietly takes En and goes to his room, shutting the door and keeping the lights off.

_“You can never fit in.”_

Yuri knows that the movie was about proving that statement wrong, that love is all people need to find a family, and family is created by love. Yuri knows now that he is wanted in this house. Yugo, Yuto, and Sora are all good to him. Yoko dotes on him the way she does all the boys, Yusho has pictures of all of them in his wallet, and Yuya…Yuya would be devastated if Yuri felt like he didn’t belong. Yuya wants everyone to feel included, and happy. Sometimes Yuri is scared to not be happy for Yuya, because he’s seen how far Yuya will go for others, while totally ignoring his own needs. Yuri hopes that Yuya is working on that in therapy.

Yuri goes to his desk and takes Starve Venom out of his deck holder. The dragon awakens, it’s presence surrounding Yuri and prodding at him curiously.

“Do I want a family?” Yuri asks the card.

He did when he was a child, in the orphanage. He wanted someone to come and pick him out of the crowd of children, take him home and spoil him with toys and clothes, fresh food and love. He wanted a mother who would dote on him, a father who would give Yuri a last name and provide a future that Yuri could be sure of. Leo Akaba gave Yuri some of those things, just enough where Yuri thought he could be happy, until he forgot what being happy and loved even felt like. Now that he’s learning it again, Yuri realizes that he has to make a choice.

He’s still not sure what he feels for Yuya. If it’s healthy, what he feels, if it’s merely a projection. Yuri doesn’t know if he’ll ever be honest with anyone about it. But if Yuri has any hope of one day asking Yuya to go out on a date with him…then he can’t ask Yoko and Yusho to adopt him.

“Family, or boyfriend,” Yuri muses.

The logical choice would be family. The likelihood of Yuri ever admitting to possibly want a relationship with anyone, never mind Yuya, is so slim. And what if he puts himself out there and is rejected? That would be horrifying, there’s no way Yuri would even bring it up until he and Yuya no longer lived together, and that is a long way off. Meanwhile, Yoko and Yusho have given them the option of being adopted from the beginning.

Sora was the first to take them up on the offer. He became Sora Sakaki just a few days after Yuri was released from the hospital’s psychiatric ward. They went to the courthouse together to watch Yoko and Yusho sign the adoption papers, and after that they went out to dinner.

A month later, Yugo asked if he could be adopted, and they later learned that Rin asked Mr. Hiiragi to adopt her, too. The two families filed the papers at the same time, went to the court house together, and the whole lot of them celebrated the adoptions of Rin Hiiragi and Yugo Sakaki.

Yuri knew that Serena had the same thoughts Yuri did—she was, after all, trailing after Yuzu with hearts in her eyes—but Serena didn’t have the same longing for a family that Yuri had.

“I get along with Shuzo pretty well, and actually he’s more like a friend to me than a father,” She had confessed to Yuri.

Yuri understood that. He had a feeling that Yuto had a similar line of thought, but Yuri wasn’t sure how to talk to him about it, especially since to do so, he would have to talk about Yuya.

Yuya.

Yuri groans and plops himself down on the floor. Everything seems to come back to Yuya. But Yugo and Yuto don’t seem affected by Yuya the way Yuri is. Is it because they aren’t as damaged as Yuri? Is it wrong for Yuri to feel this way about Yuya? The war is over, the one-year anniversary of the war’s end is fast approaching, yet there are still unanswered questions. Why were there four boys who looked like each other, born around the same time, in different dimensions? They didn’t have the same DNA, Reiji Akaba had proved that with a simple test. Their looks are the only thing they share, really. As far as Yuri is concerned, when it came down to it there is nothing inherently special about himself, or Yuya, Yugo, or Yuto. In fact, the thing that made them so powerful, that made them come together at all, is their dragons. Just like Yuzu, Serena, Rin, and Ruri were special because of their bracelets.

Yuri looks down at Starve Venom. “Why did you choose me?”

The dragon doesn’t answer. In fact, Yuri can no longer feel its presence at all. It had gone dormant, as it always did whenever Yuri tries to get answers from it.

Yuri puts the card on his desk and looks at his clock. Three hours had gone by, and he’s sure the house is dark and quiet. Yuri opens his door and the dog dashes over to him.

“I’m just going outside,” Yuri says quietly. “Want to come?”

He doesn’t know why he talks to the dog, surely it cann’t understand him, but then Yuri talks to his plants, too, so maybe it isn’t that odd. The dog follows Yuri down the stairs and to the back door. Yuri disables the alarm system and slips outside. He sits on the tiny porch while the dog frolicks in the grass, sniffing and running. He finds a ball and brings it to Yuri, and Yuri throws it for him a few times. After a while Yuri hears the back door open and he turns around to see Yoko.

“Am I too loud?” Yuri asks, though it was the dog who was doing most of the moving.

“Not at all,” Yoko says. “I just found myself unable to sleep. I came downstairs to make tea and found you here. Would you mind if I sit with you?”

Yuri shakes his head. Yoko sits a few inches away, not quite touching Yuri, but not so far as to be considered unfriendly or closed off. Yuri had found himself noticing such details about body language recently.

“You seem to be lost in thought,” Yoko says.

Yuri shrugs. “I guess.”

“Anything I might be able to help with?”

“I don’t think so,” Yuri says.

The dog trots over to Yuri and sits beside him. Yuri pats his head.

“Yuri, I’d like to ask you something,” Yoko says. “Are you afraid of me?”

Yuri gulps and refuses to look at Yoko. “I know you’re not going to hurt me.”

“Alright, let me rephrase that,” Yoko says. “Are you afraid that I’ll be angry with you if you say certain things to me?”

How on earth is she able to see through Yuri so clearly? “Am I transparent?” Yuri asks.

“No,” Yoko says, “But I’ve been a mother to a teenage boy for a few years now, and before that I was…well, a delinquent. I know what it looks like when people are afraid to tell the truth, and I want you to feel like you can tell me anything. I want to help you, but I can only do that if I know what’s bothering you.”

Yuri’s chest aches and he wonders if he’s going to cry. Usually when he gets this feeling in his chest, it means he’ll cry soon. “Things are good now,” Yuri says quietly. “I don’t want to ruin them.”

“Don’t worry about that,” Yoko says. “Listen, how about this, whatever you tell me now, I’ll keep it a secret. Unless I feel like you’ll hurt yourself, but I have a feeling that’s not what this about. Whatever you say, I’ll keep it between us.”

“I don’t know if I believe you,” Yuri says.

“Perhaps you could if you picked your head up.”

Yuri folds his hands together to conceal how badly they’re shaking. He looks over at Yoko.

Her eyes are soft, and she’s smiling. Her face is open, the way it always is, and not for the first time Yuri thinks that Yuya looks a lot like her. And since Yuri looks like Yuya, that means he looks like Yoko. If they were to be seen together, by a stranger, perhaps they would think Yuri was Yoko’s son.

Yoko holds out her hand. Yuri hesitates, then he takes it. Yoko links their fingers together.

“I promise you,” Yoko says, “Whatever you tell me won’t make me love you any less.”

Yuri’s heart stutters to a stop. “Love?” He echoes.

“Of course, sweetheart,” Yoko says. “Just like I love Yuya, and Sora, Yugo, and Yuto.”

“But I’m not your son,” Yuri says, his voice breaking.

“Maybe not by blood, or legally, but in my heart, that’s what you are. It’s what you’ve been since you set foot in this house. Nothing can change that.”

Yuri’s vision blurs with tears. “Not even…the fact that I might possibly…like Yuya?”

“Not even that,” Yoko says firmly.

“I mean like like,” Yuri babbles, pulling his hand out of Yoko’s. “Like…crush. Like love. If I even know how to do that.”

“Oh, Yuri,” Yoko says sadly, “Of course you know how to love.”

Yuri looks down at his feet. “I can’t be your son if I like Yuya.” Tears spill over on his cheeks and he quickly wipes them away.

Yoko holds out her arm. “Come here, honey.”

Yuri remembers having a dream like this as a child. A woman holding her arms out and calling, ‘Come here, son!’

Yuri inches over until he’s pressed against Yoko’s side. She wraps her arms around him and tucks his head under her chin. “Love is nothing to be ashamed of,” She says quietly. “You seem unsure of yourself and what you feel for Yuya. I know it can be strange to sort through these things on your own.”

Yuri sniffles. “What if I’m wrong? What if I’m just projecting? I have no idea if I’m just happy that someone finally cares about me!”

“That doesn’t invalidate what you feel,” Yoko says, stroking Yuri’s hair. “Very often we fall in love with people because they show us the things that are missing in our lives. That’s what drew me to Yusho. He showed me what it was like to change others through compassion, rather than intimidation. At first I wondered if I, too, was projecting. Did I love this man, or did I want to be like him?”

Yuri leans back a little bit. “How did you figure it out?” He asks, desperation creeping into his voice. If Yoko can give him the answers…

“Well, I wouldn’t say I ‘figured it out,’” Yoko says. “Sometimes, things can be figured out. Sometimes, problems are like a puzzle. You gather the pieces together, lay them in front of you, and see what fits where. But I’ve found that love is not like a puzzle at all. Love comes in all shapes, forms, disguises itself and creeps up on you when you least expect it. Very often, if you ask someone to pinpoint the moment they fell in love, or the exact things they love about a person, they find that they can’t answer. I find that the best things about my relationship with Yusho are the things I can’t put a name to, or can’t explain in words. The feeling in my chest when I look at him…I’ve never felt it for another person. It was brand new, and it scared me at first, until I realized what it was. Sometimes even then, it scared me.”

Yuri knows what she means. The things he feels for Yuya, he’s never felt them before, and he doesn’t know when it started. It was before he started seeing Leo Akaba’s face everywhere, that much he knows. And Yuya…Yuya worried. He worried because to him, Yuri feeling hopeless to the point of wanting to end it all was the worst thing that could have happened.

When Yuri was in the hospital, Yuya always begged the nurses to let him stay past visiting hours. Sometimes they did, and Yuya would spend the extra time talking to Yuri about things they had already talked about, or telling Yuri stories he had already heard, and Yuri listened mostly in silence. Once, Yuri asked why Yuya still stayed so late.

“I don’t know,” Yuya admitted. “I guess I just…hope that something will make you want to talk back.”

Yuri was surprised. “What could I possibly have to say?”

“Anything at all,” Yuya said. “I want to hear what’s on your mind. It doesn’t have to be happy, or interesting, or groundbreaking. I just want you to talk to me. I don’t want you to ever feel like there’s something you can’t say to me.”

Yoko had told Yuri just that. And those words had such a different effect on Yuri when Yuya said them, than when Yoko said them. In fact, Yuya and Yoko were a lot alike. But Yuri thought of Yoko as a mother, and Yuya as a friend who he quite possibly had a crush on.

“Is it possible,” Yuri asks slowly, trying to organize his thoughts, “That two people can say the same things, and they affect you differently because of who said them?”

“Certainly,” Yoko says. “The way in which we view people often affects how we hear what they tell us.”

“How is that possible?” Yuri asks.

“I don’t know,” Yoko says. “I’m sure the things I’ve heard from Yusho are things I’ve heard a thousand times from other people. But it always sounds different, coming from him. Is it because I love him? Quite possibly. Love didn’t affect my hearing, and certainly my heart has nothing to do with my ears, but love isn’t so easily explained.”

“You’ve got that right,” Yuri says with a sigh.

“Let me ask you this, then,” Yoko says. “When you think about Yuya, how do you feel?”

“Happy,” Yuri answers automatically. “Happier than I’ve ever felt in my life. And I want to…to make him happy, too.”

“That’s wonderful,” Yoko says. “Yuri, that’s such a wonderful thing to feel. I’m so glad for you.”

Yuri starts to cry again. “But…he’s your son. I hurt him.”

“You didn’t know any better,” Yoko says. “You wouldn’t dream of hurting him now, would you?”

Yuri shakes his head.

“People change,” Yoko says. “You changed, you grew up. You’ll keep growing. Maybe your feelings will change, maybe not. I can see that even now, you don’t know what you feel. But Yuri, don’t force yourself to feel a certain way, because you want to make everyone else happy. Not even me, or Yuya. To answer your earlier question, you can still be my son and like Yuya. Don’t you know that if you marry Yuya, you’ll be my son-in-law?”

“Marry?!” Yuri screeches.

Yoko laughs. “I know, it’s not what you’re thinking of right now. But sons, and mothers, come in all kinds of different titles. I call Yusho’s parents ‘mom and dad,’ though I’m not their biological daughter. They call me their daughter, though I’m married to their son. If you don’t want to be adopted because you think it’ll hurt your relationship with Yuya, I’m not going to tell you that you’re wrong, but you can still want me to be a mother to you, I can do that without signing a piece of paper. I already love you, so what happens because of that is up to you.”

Yuri’s crying so hard he can barely speak, but he manages to say, “I wish I’d met you sooner.”

“Oh, honey,” Yoko says, hugging Yuri tightly, “I wish that, too. But I’m here now. I’m here for you.”

 

At breakfast the next morning, Yuya notices Yuri’s red, swollen eyes. “Did you have a nightmare?”

Yuri shakes his head. “No. I think I cried because I was happy.”

Yoko smiles at Yuri. “Did you want some more pancakes, sweetie?” She asks.

“No, thank you,” Yuri says. “But I wanted to ask everyone if it’s okay if I change En’s name.”

“Well, he is yours now,” Yuya says. “What do you want to call him?”

Yuri answers, “Stitch.”

He really, really liked that movie.

 

**Author's Note:**

> The lovely twitter user hyuu_ygo drew fanart for this story! Find it here :  
> https://twitter.com/hyuu_ygo/status/786439377694044160


End file.
